[Book Review] Spongebob Squarepants: The Song that Never Ends by Steven Banks

You know how every so often, a Spongebob Squrepants episode will come out with a plot that devotes an entire eleven-to-fifteen minute segment to proving that the universe is conspiring to make Squidward's life a living hell, even when he doesn't actually do anything wrong? Aren't those episodes fucking hilarious?

No, they are not.

Sure, some of the one-off jokes can be hysterical in those episodes. But I cannot wrap my mind around why I'm supposed to be amused by a character being punished for things such as "expecting privacy" or "being upset by his neighbor's persistent stalking" or "disliking trespassers". I mean, can you imagine living between two neighbors like Spongebob and Patrick?

The Song That Never Ends, then, is the picture book equivalent of one of those episodes, and, as usual for these books, it neglects all the humor that's normally interjected by the animation and voice acting. And so it just comes off as mean instead of funny.

Seriously, can we just let something nice happen to Squidward for a change? Because, you know, this is a thing:

Kinda heavy for a children's show.

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